How to change what you can control (your negative attitude)
Most of our stress comes from the way we respond to a situation or moment, not the way life is.
And when you change your attitude, all that extra stress, is gone.
There is a real opportunity in every difficult situation to understand yourself more deeply, and also to improve your life. In every situation, there is a negative and there is a positive even when it feels all negative.
I encourage you to reflect on past situations where you’ve felt let down – where life’s outcomes were nowhere near as good as you expected. Rather than focusing on the uncontrollable things that were “done to you,” consider instead your part in what went down. For example, perhaps your gut told you not to do something, but you did so anyway. Or maybe you were deceived a second time by the same person, and wish you had let go of the relationship sooner. Or perhaps you just weren’t paying attention and ended up missing out on a great opportunity.
I remember a situation when I was living upstate New York and a friend had moved his family from Atlanta Georgia to join me, we fell out over something quite minor and I forgave him, he came to my house one evening and asked if he could use my studio equipment to do some editing so I said yes as Iv loved this guy like a brother for a good 10yrs or more.
When he arrived that night to use my equipment my gut feeling told me not to let him, however as you do I went against that decision and to cut a long story short I woke up the next morning all my equipment was stolen.
It’s so easy to be negative when things go wrong, or blame others for negative outcomes in your life. But do negativity and blame change anything for the better?
No!
Truth be told, the best time to be positive and take responsibility for your happiness is when you don’t feel like it. Because that’s when doing so can make the biggest difference.
No matter what the specifics of your troubled times are, taking a moment to look inward at what you could have done differently and how you could potentially avoid similar situations in the future can be a healthy exercise. This is not to blame yourself or shame yourself, but simply to give you the opportunity to learn, on a higher level, from your experiences.
It’s about learning to choose the most effective response in a difficult, uncontrollable life situation.
It’s about learning to think better so you can ultimately live better, no matter what.
The key is to realize that no matter what happens, you can choose your attitude and inner dialog, this can be a challenge because we are already accustomed to reacting one way.
which dictates pretty much everything that happens next. Truly, the greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another – to train our minds to see the good in what we’ve got, even when it’s far less than we expected.
It’s about choosing: Will I allow this to upset me? Will I choose to make this bad or good? Will I choose to stay or walk away? Will I choose to yell or whisper? Will I choose to react or take the time to respond?
Ultimately the challenge in making a choice that will better serve you takes time and practice although in the moment you can overcome and make that better choice be you aware of it in that very moment.
So sometimes when a friend is feeling down about a life situation they can’t control, I typically start by reinforcing the hard truth: sometimes changing your situation isn’t possible – or simply not possible soon enough. You can’t get to a new job in an instant. You can’t make someone else change against his or her will. And you certainly can’t erase the past. But...
You CAN always choose an attitude that moves you forward time and time again I have spoken to young people or a friend explaining that they can choose an attitude that can move them forward by choosing to first face the problem or situation head on without emotion attached to it that will bring you down. And doing so will help you change things from the inside out, and ultimately allow you to grow beyond the struggles you can’t control.
Truly caring for you
8 Habits To Enhance Your Mind Power
Click Here!
There is a real opportunity in every difficult situation to understand yourself more deeply, and also to improve your life. In every situation, there is a negative and there is a positive even when it feels all negative.
I encourage you to reflect on past situations where you’ve felt let down – where life’s outcomes were nowhere near as good as you expected. Rather than focusing on the uncontrollable things that were “done to you,” consider instead your part in what went down. For example, perhaps your gut told you not to do something, but you did so anyway. Or maybe you were deceived a second time by the same person, and wish you had let go of the relationship sooner. Or perhaps you just weren’t paying attention and ended up missing out on a great opportunity.
I remember a situation when I was living upstate New York and a friend had moved his family from Atlanta Georgia to join me, we fell out over something quite minor and I forgave him, he came to my house one evening and asked if he could use my studio equipment to do some editing so I said yes as Iv loved this guy like a brother for a good 10yrs or more.
When he arrived that night to use my equipment my gut feeling told me not to let him, however as you do I went against that decision and to cut a long story short I woke up the next morning all my equipment was stolen.
It’s so easy to be negative when things go wrong, or blame others for negative outcomes in your life. But do negativity and blame change anything for the better?
No!
Truth be told, the best time to be positive and take responsibility for your happiness is when you don’t feel like it. Because that’s when doing so can make the biggest difference.
No matter what the specifics of your troubled times are, taking a moment to look inward at what you could have done differently and how you could potentially avoid similar situations in the future can be a healthy exercise. This is not to blame yourself or shame yourself, but simply to give you the opportunity to learn, on a higher level, from your experiences.
It’s about learning to choose the most effective response in a difficult, uncontrollable life situation.
It’s about learning to think better so you can ultimately live better, no matter what.
The key is to realize that no matter what happens, you can choose your attitude and inner dialog, this can be a challenge because we are already accustomed to reacting one way.
which dictates pretty much everything that happens next. Truly, the greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another – to train our minds to see the good in what we’ve got, even when it’s far less than we expected.
It’s about choosing: Will I allow this to upset me? Will I choose to make this bad or good? Will I choose to stay or walk away? Will I choose to yell or whisper? Will I choose to react or take the time to respond?
Ultimately the challenge in making a choice that will better serve you takes time and practice although in the moment you can overcome and make that better choice be you aware of it in that very moment.
So sometimes when a friend is feeling down about a life situation they can’t control, I typically start by reinforcing the hard truth: sometimes changing your situation isn’t possible – or simply not possible soon enough. You can’t get to a new job in an instant. You can’t make someone else change against his or her will. And you certainly can’t erase the past. But...
You CAN always choose an attitude that moves you forward time and time again I have spoken to young people or a friend explaining that they can choose an attitude that can move them forward by choosing to first face the problem or situation head on without emotion attached to it that will bring you down. And doing so will help you change things from the inside out, and ultimately allow you to grow beyond the struggles you can’t control.
Truly caring for you
8 Habits To Enhance Your Mind Power
Click Here!
Comments
Post a Comment